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    1. #16
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      Jacob listened to her point and realized that she was right. Maybe it was more beneficial to him that he'd simply vanished from most of the galaxy or they thought he was dead. Although some within the Jedi knew he was alive and on a different path. But, they tried to bring him back which they knew wouldn't happen. They tried though. Jacob knew that if her contacts could be valuable that he'd have no choice but to let her remain as such. As she brought up the point of hiding in plain sight he had to agree with that as well. Sure he wouldn't have made an impact if he'd just walked in without his attire on. Then again at times it was necessary. Sitting forward in his seat he knew that some things about her wouldn't change and he knew that he'd not tell her what to do within the Penumbra.

      "You bring up a valid point there. Maybe it was more beneficial to me that I simply vanished in many ways." Jacob said through the metallic modulator in his mask, "Yes, my attire may make some turn heads, but at times it's necessary. Though I agree as not many would suspect you to be a Dark Side user."

      He then rose from his seat and then turned his shoulder to her, "If you want we can leave now. But I have a room here if you wanna discuss things further. You asked what was underneath this...well...I'm ready to show you. Plus...if you saw you might recognize who my son is."

    2. #17
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      Desiree was confident that he'd see her point and was happy to learn that she wouldn't have to take quite a drastic step as Jacob had too. She could understand why he'd done it that way though and felt sorry for him that he'd had to sacrifice so much, especially his family in order to fit in with the Dark Jedi. For her though, the circumstances were just completely different and there was no need for her to take the same action. The blonde was certain that she could help her new faction in its work but she needed the freedom to do things in her own way. She had never been a conventional Jedi and inside, the Nar Shaddaa native knew that she probably wouldn't be a conventional Dark Jedi either, if there even was such a thing. Somehow, she had the impression that the members of her new faction would be far more varied in nature than the one she'd come from.

      "No one's going to be surprised seeing me following you up to a private room," Desiree joked, a grin flashing across her face, lightening the more serious mood that had taken over the booth, "I must admit that I'm curious to see what you've got hidden underneath all that gear and I see no reason to suddenly rush off. Lead on."

      It was his final words that left her slightly puzzled though and she pondered about just what meant by them. Had she met his son and not been aware of it or something? Considering all the people she knew, it could be almost anyone.


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    3. #18
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      Jacob laughed at that, "Yeah, I'm sure some would already know what was happening."

      He then lead on outside and through the streets. As he did he remembered the things he left behind such as his younger son and daughter at that time. They didn't belong with him at that time and he knew Marie wouldn't follow the path he was on. It was a dark one and he remembered leaving them and making them think he was dead. His ex-wife knew the truth however and she saw past it. But, to their kids she said their father had died as a noble Jedi for a cause that his kids believed in. Which is why Jacob became a Jedi he knew. To follow in his footsteps and do better then him. Renee followed him later on and he knew that Renee wasn't like him or her brother. She was a woman now. Only it seemed so many years ago he held her as a little baby.

      When they traversed the streets to the hotel not a block away he then lead her into the elevator. As the two headed up the elevator it stopped on the second floor. Smirking to himself he didn't say much as they walked out of it. Then heading through the hallway leading to different rooms they stopped at one labeled "Room 205" and he then slid the card key into it. Hearing the lock click open he then sped up the door opening as he summoned the Force. No need to hide what he was at this point with the Force. It slide open faster as he waved his hand across it. Once the Dark Jedi Knight stepped inside he then stood near the foot of the bed looking around at his bag sitting at the foot. Turning around he then sighed.

      "Now you'll see what's underneath." Jacob said and removed the mask showing his true face underneath.

      The reason he said that she might recognize his son more then him was that they looked so much alike. Jacob Jr was just a younger version of his dad more or less. Smiling, Jacob then blinked his orange colored eyes at her as his long hair then came down. Usually Jacob had it tied in a ponytail but before that he had cut it short. Just let it grow out to what Desiree would see before her. It was dark brown and had a hint of gray near his temples. The former Jedi was in his early forties now and he was surprisingly looking like he was 30. Must have been his genes he figured.

      "So....what do you think?" He asked with a chuckle.

    4. #19
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      "I've seen worse," Desiree replied cheekily, her normal cheerful personality returning now that all of the philosophy talk was done, "I admit that I wasn't quite sure what to expect. For all I know you could of looked like a decrepit old zombie like most Sith do. Glad to see that's not true."

      Smirking, the blonde took a few steps forward so that she could get a proper look at him, having to tilt her head up slightly given that he was a fair bit taller than her. His orange eyes gave away his past and she vainly hoped that she wouldn't end up with a similar set once she started down the darker road that she was about to start on. Desiree was awfully fond of her blue eyed gaze and intended to keep it that way although she knew that as long as she kept her centre then she'd probably be fine. The thought of ending up looking like Jack ran through her mind and sent a shiver running down her spine. No one deserved that fate, no one. It was quite a useful warning to her in truth and would help her find the balance that she would be seeking. The last thing she wanted to happen was for her to look like a circus attraction too.

      "I swear that I recognise you from some....," she started, before clicking her fingers as she recognised him, "You look like a Padawan that I sparred with once, his name was Jacob Junior...."

      Putting two and two together, she simply added, remembering Jacob's words from before which linked it all together, "Oh, now I see."


      Thanks Chiara for the beautiful sig!

    5. #20
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      "I'm sure you have." Jacob said with a grin, "Well then guess it's good I became a Dark Jedi then. Wonder what I'd look like now if I'd stayed with the Sith."

      As he looked down to her his orange colored eyes blinked. They were the normal color, well granted his eyes turned that color from something when his mother was pregnant with him. Some reason the Force had other ideas in mind and he ended up with the orange color to his eyes. His daughter and son ended up with their mother's eye color. So in a way he was grateful for that. But as she put two and two together the former Jedi then smiled. Apparently she did know his son. Which the two Murano men did look nearly identical. Well that's what many had said including his friend, N'yssa who he'd spoken with off and on through the years he'd been on Ruusan. Junior was starting to act more like him all the time from what both N'yssa and Renee said about his son. Didn't surprise Jacob in the least. His father was sort of his hero for a time. Until he found out where Jacob had really gone to. Far as Junior knew he was a Sith. Not a honorable and noble Jedi who died protecting others.

      "Yeah, everyone says that he and I are nearly identical. That he's just a young version of me." Jacob said with a shrug, "I guess he acts quite a lot like his old man. More then I would guess."

      He then took his robes off and set them across the chair to his right. His black long sleeved shirt then presented itself along with his long black pants that were seemingly custom tailored to him. Probably a good thing given he was over 6 feet tall. He was 6'5" to be exact. Jacob accounted his height to his dad and grandfather given how tall they both were. Stern faced but kind and it's no wonder Jacob himself looked that way. He was stern looking at times but he was kind at heart. Although get on his bad side and one would see that he could be menacing also.

      "Feels long ago I'd been among the Jedi." Jacob said remembering his youth, "But there is also a reason I call myself The Unforgiven. Being both a part of the Jedi and Sith...I'd seen both sides. Neither suited me after a while. Jedi want to either imprison me or try and convert me. The Sith...well...they'd want me dead. Either way they'd never forgive me for leaving either of them."

    6. #21
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      The similarities between father and son were staggering and Desiree could certainly see that as another reason as to why he wore his gear most of the time. His explanation about his relationship with the other Force factions added more to it as well, giving her a pretty good window in to the situation that he was in. If she was in the same position, Desiree would probably want to keep herself hidden too, not because it was cowardly or anything like that but because it was just the smart option to take. The blonde had to admit that she was becoming more and more interested in his back story, the more he spoke of it. She was always a sucker for a good story and over the years, she must of heard hundreds of them, from people of all walks or life. The history of those she met always fascinated her.

      "What was it that made you leave the other Force factions?" she asked, her curiosity piqued, "Did you become tired of the whole endless struggle between the two or was it more philosophy based and a sense of not belonging like it was for me? I know you said that part of the reason why you left the Jedi was because they weren't willing to do what was necessary but was there more to it than that? I mean it must of been something extreme if you took the option to leave your family behind."

      In fairness, family wasn't something that she knew too much about. Her relationship with her own father was pretty much non existent. Perhaps that was why she was so open when it came to relationships, not that she'd trade her lifestyle for a two point four children one.


      Thanks Chiara for the beautiful sig!

    7. #22
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      As she asked the first question and the many others, Jacob then sat down on the bed and offered her a seat beside him. When he cleared his throat he stared at the wall and desk with the chair which his robes were folded over, "There was ideology involved yes, but the reason I left the Jedi was...well...you remember when I said that everyone has inner darkness?"

      Looking over at her he then continued, "I'll answer that...that was rhetorical. Anyways...there is a Force Nexus far off from here. Balthim to be exact. I'd found it once when I was a newly promoted Jedi Knight. Studied it in fact and found that it amplified my Force power. I was more connected to it in fact. Although...I didn't realize...it was tainted. In my youth I was brash...arrogant at times and had darker tendencies. I learned from that. Purged myself, or so I thought, of the darkness within. I was wrong. I just stuffed it down. That nexus was tainted with the darkness. I had attached to me...and I didn't realize it influenced me. So, after that I went to take down a group of rouge Force users and almost died."

      The former Jedi then looked over at the wall in front of him again, sighing, "No one came to help. They didn't even go back after I returned to the temple and take them out. I had a student named Viktor. Trained him the best I could before I was sent on that mission. After I returned I had heard he did well and trained hard in my absence. I went to promote him and was denied. After all that time there...all that I'd sacrificed. That and the nexus' influence just brought out my inner darkness. I couldn't deny it anymore."

      Jacob figured he'd tell her the whole backstory of his time with the Jedi. Well as much as he could without completely boring her to death. It was long winded enough. So now he sighed once more and his orange eyes looked over at her and he blinked a few times. As he looked down to the floor after he glanced at Desiree he then looked back up at the wall again placing his hands on his lap and brought his hands together.

      "Their ideals and my own had clashed. I believed they should do what was at times necessary. So I did. They didn't do it so I had to. All they did was watch things happen. It was both ideals and my own experiences that turned me away from them." Jacob said, "That's the story of my time as a Jedi."

    8. #23
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      As Jacob told his story, Desiree quickly started to sympathise with him and found herself placing a hand on his shoulder and gently squeezing, a simple sign that she felt him for him. There were parts of his tale which rang a little too true for her and as he spoke about his student being denied a promotion and the Jedi's lack of action, it reached another level. She had experienced such an event during her time among the Order although the blonde hadn't spoken of it yet. It had been early on in her Jedi career, shortly after completing her first rank of training. It hadn't been a pleasant experience for her and when she thought about it now, she wondered why she hadn't left sooner. Perhaps she'd been naive enough to believe that things would change but as always with the Jedi, nothing ever did.

      "My first Master, a guy named Judah Lesan, started to act strangely after travelling to a particular planet," she finally said once The Unforgiven had finished, "He became more and more erratic and eventually took a ship and left the place. I followed him and we spent the next few months away from the Order, living an almost ordinary life. There was something clearly wrong with him but rather than run, I stuck with him, through thick and thin. It took the Jedi months before they finally bothered to send a pair of Jedi after us and he'd almost been completely corrupted by then. It turns out that he'd been infected by some Dark Jedi plague or something and the only reason he hadn't completely snapped was because I had been there all that time, managing to do enough to keep him from going over the edge."

      A frown crossed her features and she briefly paused for a moment before carrying on, "What happened when we returned to the Jedi you might ask? I was hauled in front of the Council and used as a scapegoat for their lack of action. They needed someone to judge and so that ended up being me. What an absolute bunch of arrogant *** covering bigots. I spent months taking care of him, only to be punished for it."

      Taking a breath, she smiled again, "I think our views and experiences with them are pretty similar. Was it the same thing with the Sith too?"


      Thanks Chiara for the beautiful sig!

    9. #24
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      Jacob listened to the whole story. Didn't surprise him in the least that they used her as a scapegoat. They did the same to him more or less. Further he had gone on a mission for them and did what he could only for them to turn everything around on him and make him seem like the one at fault. They didn't act it was he who had to do things. Almost got him killed and he had to suffer for it. That is when he let his darker side out and embraced it. Sure, he was full of anger at the time he'd left them and it is what drew him to the Sith. Thought their beliefs weren't his own either. He realized that within the year he'd been there. It just wasn't who he was deep down. After a few months of drinking his life away pretty much Killian had found him and brought him to Ruusan. That was where his whole life changed and he was much better off for it.

      "They did the same to me, Desiree." Jacob said as he put a hand on her shoulder as she did him, "I know how you feel. They scapegoated me too."

      The former Jedi Knight nodded, and it seemed they had. Although Jacob was older then her she'd seen more then her fair share of things in her life. Which was unfortunate for someone as young as she was. While Jacob recalled some of his past as a Sith, Desiree asked if it was the same for him there. To be frank, yes it was. Although he had a slightly different story on that part.

      "I was full of anger which turned me to them. Full of all these pent up emotions like that." Jacob said looking at the wall again and sighed, "Although within a year of being there...I realized that they're one track minded beliefs weren't mine either. I wasn't a brute. Nor was I some chaotic and destructive person. I think I only went there to spite half the people within the Jedi who knew me. Though to be honest I wouldn't change it if I could. It's what happened to me that has made me stronger for it. More experienced and shaped me to what I am today."

    10. #25
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      She could understand his reasons for joining the Sith after his time among their rivals although it wasn't an option that she'd considered for a moment. Desiree had met a few during her time among the Jedi and although the Nar Shaddaa native did her utmost not to judge them, she knew deep down that the ways of the Empire were just not her way. The thought of becoming a mass murderer or a destruction loving person just wasn't in her and the blonde knew that she'd never be able to live with herself if she ever chose that path. In a way, their ways were just as narrow as the Order's was, except that instead of burying their emotions, the Sith simply gave in and became overwhelmed by them and giving in completely. It sounded just as out of touch as the Jedi way and she had begun to realise that perhaps the entire idea of Light and and Dark side was perhaps at fault. It was all about emotion at how people dealt with it.

      "They are as bad as each other then," she said after hearing the other half of Jacob's tale, speaking her thoughts aloud, "One side wants to bury their emotions while the other wants to give in completely. When I think about it now, I can't honestly believe that I was suckered in to the the whole idea. Why be either one side or the other when you can simply learn to accept who you are and learn to find what works for you. The Jedi and Sith almost seem childish, now that you've introduced me to this third way."

      There was one other question though that she was curious about and by this point, she felt comfortable about asking whatever came to mind, "Do you think that the Dark Jedi will always remain in the shadows regardless of what happens among the other factions?"


      Thanks Chiara for the beautiful sig!

    11. #26
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      Jacob smiled, "Yeah...does seem kinda childish. Be who you are and not be afraid to use emotion and not be consumed by them."

      As she asked the question of whether the Dark Jedi would remain hidden he then pondered for a moment. In truth he thought they would remain hidden for the sake of not wanting to have targets from the Sith and Jedi on their head. Although he was afraid if they came directly forward they'd have to move from Ruusan to another planet. Onderon was a possibility and if it had to be it had to be. But to him, their secretive doings in the galaxy were what fit them. Always hidden, always remaining in the shadows and influencing things between both Jedi and Sith if it came to that. Playing them both and allied with them if the need had to be. Jacob knew in his own mind he'd rather remain hidden because of his ties to the two factions he used to belong to. But he then looked over at Desiree and then shrugged.

      "I think we should remain that way. Regardless we ally with them if the need fits. Though in truth we try and avoid them so as to not bring attention to ourselves. People of Ruusan don't like Force users. Given the history that happened there I don't blame them. If it came out we'd have to move somewhere else. That is why we also remain hidden." Jacob said just giving his honest opinion and fact.

      He then paused for a moment, then said to her, "Would you believe me that I'd once turned away from the Force...not once...but twice? Until a man named Killian found me and brought me to the Dark Jedi. Would you believe that?"

    12. #27
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      Nodding her head as he answered her question, Desiree pondered about the topic for a moment or two but his answer made sense to her and she was satisfied. The name of the home planet was one that she didn't know all that much about but the fact they didn't like Force users caused her to wonder about just what she was about to step into. However, that was something for another time and her only real worry was that the place was at least warmed than the frigid ice ball that the Jedi lived on. God, how she disliked the cold and the blonde sincerely hoped that she never had to stand on that planet or others like it again. Yavin did suit the Jedi though in her view, a cold planet for a cold Order so in that respect, it made perfect sense. She just hoped that Ruusan would be a more pleasant place to live.

      "After what I've been through and what you've told me tonight, I can believe that anything is possible," she answered with a grin, "I can understand why you'd want to turn away from the Force and honestly I thought that I was done with it until we met. Putting up with the Jedi and Sith is enough to cause anyone to turn away from it and to leave it all behind. As strange as it may sound, I haven't actually missed it at all, during my time away. Did you miss it at all?"


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    13. #28
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      Jacob nodded his head, "Yeah I did honestly miss the Force. Between having it and not having it, I turned away from it when I was a Jedi. Then did so after leaving the Sith. Both times I'd drank my life away. Something caused me to come back when I was a Jedi and then Killian found me before I came to the Dark Jedi. Those times were bad. All I did was drink...and drink...and cause trouble...then drink some more."

      He remembered those days, well, most of them anyways. At times he'd black out and not remember anything that had happened the day before. Thankfully Killian found him and brought him to Ruusan and he knew that he'd more then likely be dead if he kept doing what he was. Just drinking and drinking till he had nothing left and killed his liver. That and killed his brain cells. Which he was very glad that he chose a better path and now he drank on occasion and when he wasn't drinking he tried to keep busy. At one point he was dealing with his alcoholism and after that whole ordeal was over he finally realized he didn't need it.

      "But I'm glad I am where I am. I'd rather do 'bad things' for the right reason then do good for the wrong ones. Or just do plain evil just to be evil. Which I'm not. Some may say that and the friends I still have with the Jedi want me to turn back but I told them that it wasn't possible. They respect it thankfully." Jacob said after a moment.

    14. #29
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      "I think in the end, you just have to stop worrying about what others may think," Desiree answered after some thought, "Those Jedi friends of yours may have good intentions by trying to turn you back but they are not you and they don't understand what you've been through. I could have stayed as a Jedi, continued my training and followed the Jedi way but it would of brought me nothing but misery. It's only now that I've left that I feel like myself again and I imagine that's the same for all those that have left the Jedi and perhaps the Sith too. We keep coming back to the idea just being who you are and I'm starting to think that perhaps that's the only philosophy that a person needs in order to live life to the fullest and perhaps to master the use of the Force too. I think it's just a matter of having the guts to take that first step."

      She pondered briefly about his alcoholism and knew that she was hardly the best person to talk about such a topic. The blonde had been drinking for years and had started an age that she certainly shouldn't have. Yet, that was what life was like on Nar Shaddaa and she'd fallen in to that habit and many others besides. However, she didn't think of her own drinking as a problem, it was just a tool that she used to get to know people better. Alcohol was an effective equaliser, after all.


      Thanks Chiara for the beautiful sig!

    15. #30
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      Jacob nodded, "That is one way to look at things. Just to be yourself and not hide who you are. I couldn't hide who I truly was even though I'd thought I'd purged every cell of darkness from me as a Jedi. Then once I gave into my anger and rage I realized that it wasn't the true answer. I had learned to find balance. Those that I learned from taught me that. In some form those that I'd learned from were Sith at one point. Some Jedi as well."

      He then turned to face her and gave her a reassuring smile. It was to show that she was who she was and if no one could understand that they wouldn't ever understand. All he wanted to do at this point was relate to her and show that she wasn't alone. That he understood what she had went through at times and that he was here. Even if she was a friend that she could have among the new home she'd be calling Ruusan soon. Jacob had taken time to call it that and he hadn't looked back since. On some instances he did return to Yavin VIII to see how things were. Walk through the ol' stomping grounds as it were. A former place he called home now. Looking at the Jedi home planet he didn't think it ever was to him.

      "Just know that I'm here for you if you need a friend. I'll be waiting when your ready to go. You'll find Ruusan quite different from Yavin VIII. It's much warmer there. The nobles who reside there are kinda stuck up, but you learn to deal with them. They just think they're ruling over things. We just keep it that way." Jacob said the last part with a laugh.

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